I work with a lot of people that are younger than I am, although that has little to do with what I’m about to write about. I don’t think that the word “fear” has an age limit on it. But I have heard them talk about the topic a bit on the subject that Shaun Groves addressed in a post this morning about this post, which is called “The Nasty Four-Letter Word that Keeps You From Writing.”
Fear affects us all more than we care to admit, and it’s especially insidious for writers. Writing online is one of those activities where you’re really putting yourself out there, and the critics are always waiting to pounce. But as we’ll see below, failure and mediocrity are not the only things we fear.
Most fear works at the subconscious level and manifests itself in the form of procrastination and writer’s block. We want to write that novel or business book, start that killer blog, release that article or white paper that boosts our business authority… and yet we keep putting it off.
I don’t like to waste time on regret, because, well, it’s a waste of time. But looking back, I see I’ve wasted so much time in my writing life because I let fear hold me back.
And the truth is, every time I push myself in a new direction, I’m still afraid. I don’t think that ever changes—it’s just part of the game.
The key is to not let it stop you
I’ve written a couple of books. I don’t let anyone read them, so I get the fear. I wouldn’t even know where to start to get them published. That’s why I respect Kathy T. so much as she just put her mind to it and has released one book and is looking on releasing a second. She’s fearless. I like that.
I actually started a blog in 2001 and I didn’t continue it because I didn’t think it was good enough. When I started this blog, I got through that. I would read folks like Aunt B., Sharon Cobb, TV on the fritz and think to myself that I couldn’t write or articulate like they did.
I didn’t think that anyone would give a damn about what I had to say. When I realized that I was doing this for me and was just as happy as a clam when I was getting about 15 hits a day, I realized I had denied myself a great deal of joy. Now that I have folks visit and then I go to visit them, I have been given a great deal of happiness that I would have never imagined.
Joy is a good thing.
With that said, over the years I’ve stopped myself because I didn’t feel “good” enough. But, as I’m looking at celebrating two years on this blog at the end of the month, I’ve realized that I really did deny myself so much. Those three people I read long before I blogged are now people I have met that I really like and enjoy.
I guess the thing is that deciding to be fearless is about one of the toughest things I’ve done. I am pretty transparent on this blog, although I admit that I’ve toned it down over time. I don’t vent about the job like I used to (which was pretty stupid but, of course, I didn’t know what getting Dooced was two years ago either.) I enjoy it more than ever because I’ve been able to be realize I don’t have to please other people, just myself.
About a year ago I decided that I needed to do something everyday that just scares the crap out of me. I try to do that, and it’s opened a bunch of doors. I’m writing this to you this morning because recently I took a walk out of my comfort zone and I just got my first regular paid blogging gig.
Yup, I’m getting paid to write at Teevieo. My first post went up this morning and I can read in it how nervous I am about it all. It’s just a side thing but it’s important to me, and I’m glad I walked through the fear and attempted to move forward. I hope you will come and visit me over there sometimes. I’ll be writing there about three times a week. Don’t worry, because I know you were biting your nails, I’m still here as well. Hopefully in the next little while, I can find some more cajones to get me to other new and exciting levels.
Fear is an amazing thing. Now that I’m older, I have found that I’m not letting it paralyze me like I did 20 years ago.
Now back to your regular scheduled Newscoma, already in progress.
You Said What!