Steve Austin

19 06 2008

Scout and I have both had interesting things happen this week at our jobs.

To be honest, it’s been a nightmare. I won’t expand further but let’s just say it’s yell at Newscoma week. In public. Is it the solstice? Is it the water here? Am I getting too old? (Well that would be an absolute yes.) I have decided to just stay inside away from the crazy people.

Anyhoo, Scout has this:

Staring at my hand and my scribbling as if she were studying some sort of new strain of Salmonella under a microscope, she got the interview off with a bang before I’d even had the time to ask one question.

“You obviously were never taught the Palmer method,” she deducted before going back to studying me and, this time, evaluating my posture.

“Um, no. Is that a type of writing? The Palmer method..” I answered and before I could get out another word, she came out of studying with another deduction.

“Look at how you’re holding your pen. Like a dagger,” she remarked with great disdain.

Who’s interviewing who here?

When I asked her about this, she looked a bit beat up.

It ain’t all cupcakes and kittens, campers.

But I should have my car, Steve Austin, back this week which is of the good. If you were wondering, the car’s name is Steve Austin after The Six Million Dollar Man not that wrestler dude. Since June 1, I’ve been without a vehicle. Squirrel Queen starting calling it Steve Austin because it basically has had to be rebuilt. (They had the technology. And, yeah, all my money.)

I guess I’m Oscar Goldman.




9 responses

19 06 2008
Freaky Weasel

How odd.

In the two part episode that began in $6,000,000 Man and ended in The Bionic Woman, Steve had is ass handed to him by a villian, barely escaping with his life.

In Jamie’s arms he whispered a cryptic warning at the end of part one.

“Beware the Sasquatch.”

Yet you seek the Sasquatch. Troubling. Troubling indeed.

19 06 2008

Oh, a connection…
As Squirrel Queen came up with this analogy, I’m troubled too.

19 06 2008

I still maintain that your car is a wrestler. How cold is your car? STONE COLD! Heh.

19 06 2008
Jeffraham Prestonian

I hope the solstice has nothing to do with your misfortunes, as on most years, it is my birthday.

Not this year, apparently, but most years.

We got to get you a wo… er, scooter!

19 06 2008
Six Million Dollar Man v. Sasquatch « The Squirrel Queen

[…] Newscoma’s wheels have been out of commission for weeks now. It started with one repair and turned into a total […]

19 06 2008

Yay! Glad you’re getting Steve Austin back!!!
Man, that woman, though….well….it was an experience.

19 06 2008

Well, it’s not back yet.

22 06 2008
Doctor Who Finale « Newscoma

[…] for any reason, it kind of wigs me out. Where’s my damned flying car? I have a PT Cruiser named Steve Austin that I haven’t seen in three weeks. Seriously, I expected to be living in black spandex by […]

29 06 2008
The Ongoing Adventures of Typhoid Coma « Newscoma

[…] Steve Austin is still MIA and cost me a cool $1500 to get fixed (and I still don’t have him back), people sort of lost their minds this month (this of course would include me), a much-needed beach vacation had to be canceled, my poor chief staff writer had a terrible dirt bike wreck and had to have surgery, the refrigerator is dead and I have strep throat. […]

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