I Apologize Ahead Of Time

25 02 2008

Dear Friends, Family, Strangers, Blogreaders, Woman At Fred’s Earlier, Anyone Else,

I do not have fluchitis™ but instead a nasty bout of Bronchitis and some kind of pulmonary infection that has a name that just pissed me off because I can’t remember it. All I know is I’m not expanding/collapsing right but it should be okay.

I took some antibiotics that didn’t apparently agree with me and that was why I thought I had the flu as it made me sick as a dawg. My cool nurse practitioner was very sweet and gave me an entire steroid pack to take over the week as well as groovy cough syrup, a new much better antibiotic (that won’t make me hurl) and some weird inhaler that tastes like what I imagine the inside of an operating room might be flavored.

I’m supposed to apologize to you ahead of time if I’m:

  • cranky
  • bitchy (which is the new black I hear.)
  • pissy
  • grouchy
  • irate
  • outraged over small things like the color of your socks
  • manic
  • insane
  • shouting profanities
  • short-tempered

As I found this on Twitter in one of Jagadiah‘s tweets, I think if you see me with one, you might want to run.

rocketpropelledchainsaw.jpg

Your usually kind host will be back later in the week. Oh, I’m still gonna blog, but I’m just not guaranteeing niceties until then. My patience is the size of an amoeba.

And my chief staff writer was throwing up in a trashcan this morning with the flu as we are always understaffed and bless her heart as did our page designer who also came in anyway, so I’m going to work but it will be on a short schedule this week. (Bad long sentence I know. Shut up.)

Just bring me dark chocolate truffles and tread lightly and I will put away the chainsaw.

Kthanxbai,

Newscoma

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5 responses

25 02 2008
LeBlanc

Get better! NOW!

25 02 2008
Malia

Well, for once I’m glad you live far, far away. Keep the funk to yourself young lady and get well soon! 🙂

25 02 2008
newscoma

Thanks guys.
No one will buy me the chainsaw launcher, so I guess humanity is safe.
🙂

26 02 2008
grandefille

If you can hang on until Friday, I can put it on my debit card.

I send you hugs and kisses (or “hogs and kitties,” as Baby Fishmouth says) of comfort and healing. But keep on with the cranky/bitchy/pissy/grouchy/irate/
outraged over small things like the color of your socks/manic/insane/shouting profanities/short-temperedness whenever you deem it necessary. Like next month, or something.

28 02 2008
The Constant « Newscoma

[…] 28 02 2008 First of all, all I’ve done for the past week is apologize for being completely whacked on meds fighting my bronchitis and being on steroids which has made me a quivering pile of goo. And […]

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