Cuddle Parties
11 05 2008Huh?
A Cuddle Party may look like a pajama party for grown-ups. It’s fun but there are rules. The number one rule, pajamas stay on the whole time. This is a non-sexual event.
Okay, now that we have that out of the way you may ask yourself, what’s a cuddle party?
“This is a way of framing touch in a positive way,” says cuddle party facilitator Edie Weinstein-Moser.
Edie says the parties which are held around the country and in our area are meant to help people achieve better intimacy, and communication. And it allows people to express themselves in a comfortable and safe environment.
There’s snuggling, nuzzling and even spooning. But not everyone’s ready for a group hug right away since you may not know everyone. So to get comfortable there are a few steps to start with.
No. The answer is no. I’m a huggy person but no. Hell, I hated sleep overs when I was in 5th grade. I can’t imagine doing this at 42.
Let me reiterate. No.
As the infantilization of our culture continues…
Isn’t this what dogs are for?
I’m the Cuddle Party facilitator in the CBS3 news piece. I’m glad that it is raising conversation, however, I’m sure that before anyone makes statements, they would really want to be informed about what is true and what is just imagination gone wild
1. p.j.’s really do stay on the whole time. It’s my job to make sure they do
2. Cuddle parties are not just about getting your cuddle on. What it really is, is a 3 1/2 workshop that helps people say yes to what they want in life, no to what they don’t want, being open to changing their minds along the way in every interaction. It is a workshop that teaches portable relationship skills, Is there anyone out there who wouldn’t want healthier and more loving relationships with everyone in their lives?
2. It is NOT an orgy. How sad (and maybe this is why CP is so valuable) that some minds go in that direction whenever certain types of touching are mentioned. And yet, learning the skills that can be gleaned from a CP can absolutely be put to use in sexual relationships in people’s daily lives.
3.Those who attend come from all walks of life, all socio-economic backgrounds, all ages (adults), all physical appearances, all relationship status. If you think about coming to a CP to ‘hook up’, you may be missing the whole point of it. And yes, relationships have begun when people meet there.
4.Arousal does happen. As adults, we don’t always have to act on that feeling in the moment. That issue is addressed during the Welcome Circle which creates the safe space for the remainder of the workshop to continue and allows people who may have entered the workshop as strangers to leave feeling connected and having made new friends.
5. The fee for the event breaks down to $11.43 an hour. Although it is not therapy, it does have therapeutic value. It’s a bargain when you think of the value of healthier relationships, increased self esteem, improved body image, nurturing touch, creating community, getting to know more about yourself.
6. The training as a certified facilitator ( I am one of 41 world wide at the time of this posting), involves a weekend training, called Foundations of Facilitation (not only for this workshop, but teaches ways to be a powerful facilitator of any work that people choose to do), as well as 6 months of supervision, certification (what I called training wheel) parties at which the attendees complete evaluations that are handed in to REiD Mihalko who is the co-founder of CP, weekly teleconferences, and ongoing support from the training team and other facilitators.
7. We live in cultures in which touch is either limited (especially for those who live alone or work in low touch environments), violent (there are many for whom touch was/is abusive) or sexual. At CP, it is none of the above. CP is about helping to create a touch-positive environment. Studies show that people fail to thrive when missing nurturing touch. I am also a social worker in a psychiatric hospital and so many of my patients are lacking that experience which I am convinced, contributes to their illnesses.
8. No one has to cuddle or touch anyone at a CP. It is totally optional. Before anyone touches anyone else (including friends, partners, spouses), they must ask and get a verbal yes before proceeding.
9. Even with all of this information I am sharing, the best way to REALLY KNOW, is to attend a CP. Then and only then, can you speak with any authority on this subject
Thanks for your willingness to learn more…
Edie Weinstein-Moser”
*faints*
No one has to cuddle or touch anyone at a CP. It is totally optional
Like you wanna be the one at the CP sitting over there by yourself. LOL.
It really does seem sad to me that there are people who are so lacking in human contact that this is the best idea.