Mabel’s campaign for president has been challenged by Happycat.
I’m going to let you choose. Here are Mabel’s issues.
It’s up to you. There are no superdelegates. There is only a canine or a cat that can lead our country to greatness again.
It’s up to you, my friends.
Mabel would also like to point out that HappyCat can’t spell. (It could get dirty.)
Hmmm, while as a cat lover I would like to see a cat as president, I do think that Mabel is what the country needs right now. I think she would would make a better, different-kind-of president.
The parallels I could draw from this are blowing my mind, man.
Heh. I aim to please.
God knows I am much more a cat person than a dog person, but in this case I have to continue to support Mabel.
If any of my cats were elected to office or crowned royalty, I would no doubt be forced into slavery and subservience to all felines.
Oh, wait…
I don’t mean to point out the obvious here, but the only reason HappyCat is even in this race today is because it’s a cat. People seem to want to root for the undercat, and clearly any old cat will do these days.
Oh, snap!!
Of course, Mabel is the obvious candidate. HappyCat is unfortunately associated with some shady characters, some of whom have made anti-canine remarks in the past; HappyCat still has not repudiated or renounced those remarks. HappyCat also has some unfortunate ties to the tuna lobby, and is a admitted user of catnip.
Mabel’s only weakness is her proposal for a nationwide identification system, based not on ID cards but on wide-scale, warrantless butt-sniffing.
I cannot believe that Happy Cat thinks it can just saunter into the campaign at this late date and try to take over. Happy Cat is all about mandatory litter boxes and the scandal that erupts when he admits to inhaling all that catnip will surely send him to the showers.
HappCat is a pussy.
Mabel will shake your hand and fetch and she barks at intruders at the door, err I mean border.
Vote Mabel.
HappyCat is a uniter, not a divider. HappyCat’s broken English is a sign that HappyCat is truly the candidate who will perform best on the world stage, raising awareness for famine both home and abroad. Happycat’s inexperience is addressed entirely by its distinguished running mate, the honorable Congressbeast from Alaska, the LOLrus. LOLrus, as we all know, is a champion of bukkit awareness and the prevention and control of diabeetus.
Yes, yes we can (has cheezburger)!
Sounds like a lot of rhetoric, my dear pal Ron.
We must have a debate.
“HappCat is a pussy.”
CAN’T. BREATHE. OH. GOD. FRACTURED. RIB. TOO. MUCH. HYSTERICAL. LAUGHTER.
*SNORK*
While I would like to support Mabel, Scout has been actively campaigning for a cat friend of her’s who announced her candidacy quite a while ago…. Please check out http://www.mysiamese.wordpress.com and see how Chey is doing in her bid.
PS: Bwahahahaha on “HappCat is a pussy.” Just for the record, iced coffee really came out of my nose when I read that. Not a pretty site.
The answer is clear. With whom would you rather have a beer?
…
Wait. That’s what got us in this handbasket in the first place. Mebbe not.
Mabel is the kind of candidate you want to have a beer with. So long as HappyCat doesn’t go windsurfing and eats a proper cheezsteak, we should be okay.
Besides, HappyCat is a cheezburger kind of candidate. Mabel probably only eats space food, like Tang. Stuff out of tubes and whatnot. Nothing good ol’ American! I remember who sent dogs into space, and it wasn’t America. Isn’t that right, COMRADE MABEL?!
Well, she recycles.
She doesn’t really like Tang but she’s never had any. She does eat tomatoes. She’s like Neil Armstrong. Very much an American hero.
Dan Quayle couldn’t spell either. That’s all I’m saying.
I’m willing to bet that Mabel owns an AP stylebook of her very own.
It’s not that Happycat is a pussy it’s that he/she/it? smells like one.
“I don’t mean to point out the obvious here, but the only reason HappyCat is even in this race today is because it’s a cat.”
LOL!
I am really a cat person, but Mabel has a lot of experience and a highly recognizable mug.
But cats are soft spoken and that can be good on a diplomatic front.
It’s such a tough decision. I really have to know more.
Is Happy Cat available for an interview? Where does Mabel stand on the drug war?
Have either one of them ever been to Bosnia? And if so, were they able to distinguish flowers from sniper fire?
So many questions so little time. *sigh*
I’m leaning Mabel at this point….
Attention:
I was just informed that if I don’t vote for Mabel, I’m a misogynist.
Has anyone lifted up Happy Cat’s tail lately? The name is not indicative of gender.
If HappyCat is male, I’m voting Mabel. We had enough tomcatting in the White House back in the 90s, thank you very much.
Equal rights for kittehs! Equal rights for kittehs!
Kittitarians unite!
I love you guys. Mabel, my candidate, loves you too.
She believes in cats, dogs and people.
It’s her way. I’m just saying.
This primary is as complex and all-consuming as the actual primary.